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History is replete with stories of people paying a heavy price for not heeding advice. Be that as it may, if a person is already dead set on doing something, often no amount of advising or cajoling will make them change their minds. Taken from my Facebook posting on 21 June 2018:

HOW MUCH IS UNSOLICITED ADVICE WORTH? : There’s no shortage of people who love to give unsolicited advice. We’ll have family, friends, colleagues, aunties and even strangers pointing out our “shortcomings” and how we should behave. I was a rebellious kid, and I mostly would act exactly the opposite of what my parents or teachers told me to do or not to do. I think advice giving usually doesn’t work, and in fact can often backfire. We could be seen to be imposing our values on others. We may sincerely intend to assist, but what we say might be seen as criticism or blame. Think about it – has anyone ever reacted to your advice with: “You are right! I’ll change right away”? With my employees and even my own offsprings, I’m aware whatever life pointers I give could be perceived negatively. It might be better for us to set an example rather than “advising” others how to live their lives.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Susan Quat: Sometimes our advice fell on deaf ears and we are considered as busy body and intruding into the life of others. Living an examplary life and doing the right things , never compromised our principles, that will set the right path for others to emulate especially those close to us.

Muhammad Aqil Deraman: It’s worth a lot. Not heeding was why Najib’s regime fell. He must have refused to listen to his advisers about the sentiments on the ground. He was so sure of victory in the GE that when PH pulled the carpet from under BN’s feet on May 9, he was left shell-shocked. That’s a modern day drama of the Emperor’s New Clothes.

Ong Shuh Chien: Often people who are too full of themselves, thinking that they can do no wrong, will ignore unsolicited advices especially from those below, the higher the position held. They will view these well- intended advices as challenging their authority. Only when they suffer surprised unceremonious fall from power would they be awakened to the fact that nobody in this world is invincible. History has shown time and again that government of any nation who ignored People’s Power can be overturned even if at the cost of bloodshed!
That aside, I believe we all still have to walk the path we have chosen and suffer pains from fall and broken limbs in spite of all the advices received. Success will not be appreciated if it comes too easy without sacrifices.
Happy Thursday, my friends. 😁

My other FB postings between 18 June 2018 and 24 June 2018:

18 June 2018

IT WASN’T A FREE LUNCH: Our education group is working on a major rebranding exercise, so Daniel Teng, senior executive director at SEGi University & Colleges, suggested I meet his creative and marketing heads for a casual chat over lunch, on the milestones ahead. Reform and change we all must, if businesses want to stay competitive and relevant. I find informal sessions to be useful in building rapport, boosting morale and facilitating innovation. The value of communication among team members can’t be overstated. But working with people of diverse skills and personality types is never easy. Even now, I find navigating the interpersonal dynamics of key managers to be taxing. A workplace can be likened to a thriving garden – we can’t throw some seeds around and demand to see fruits at the end of the day. We need to give the team the right conditions to develop and grow. For the all talking I did at that sitting, I didn’t feel it was a free lunch. 🤑

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Emil Lee: Good morning and a cheerful day to you Tan Sri Clement and also to all my forum mates herein. You are spot on Clement there is no such thing as “free lunch” in the business world. One need to pay when going into the washroom, a glass of plain water and other hidden charges. This analogy “ada undang di belakang batu” rings a bell here.

Kent Yee: GOOD MORNING SIR, SMILE.
A cool blessed Monday morning with grey cloudy sky lighted up, the freshness of the breeze bringing a great start of the morning after the holidays and SMILE.
The value of connection with those key members of the creatively motivated team often changes from their principle of well-being. There isn’t much about putting heads together to make it easier as expected.
A healthy creative teamwork needed much attention to those who are weak and nurturing openly that others can able to revive the dynamics cycle of continuous improvement with one head, one mindsets and passion for growth and SMILE.

Ron Juliet: Blessed Day Tan Sri Clement Hii and All the Buddies here.

The Management has to identify the potential of each individual in order to make each of them to function effectively.
There is no such thing anymore that putting someone in the job will make that person to function according to the Management instructions.
With the new and advance technologies taking over, everyone has to specialise in their chosen field and to fill in the right gap in the Organisation.
In today’s working environment, the old days of one size fits all has long disappeared, and it has been replaced with people with knowledge in the respective area of their chosen field to get the works done.
Therefore, get the right tools to get a job done.

 

19 June 2018

LISTENING CAN CHANGE THE WORLD: Everyone wants to be heard, but nobody wants to listen. I think if we’re listened to, and if our needs are understood, many things can change for the better. Relationships will improve and people can get along better. If the BN government had listened to the grassroots, it wouldn’t have been voted out. At all levels, I think listening is becoming a lost art form. I notice there’re many people, including those in my organisation, who don’t listen to understand – they listen to react. That’s when they hastily make assumptions and jump to conclusions, and oftentimes, a verbal battle follows. It’s not surprising many casual conversations end up in misunderstandings. When was the last time you were listened to deeply, and the last time you honestly listened to someone else?

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Rodjeanall Tinjan: “Listening can change the World”
-Clement Hii
The arts of listening, will let our mind paint the beautiful Wisdom of understanding, in the canvas of life. Readers were good listeners too, they know by reading and listening, our Soul and Spirit is in PEACEFUL divine power. Cheers, another sweet gorgeous Tuesday.

Ong Phaik Kim: Listening is an art!

People talk a lot. So need to listen to sieve out the root cause of their problem.

I remember a assistant manager who will listen when you talk n when her turn to talk, you better shut up!

She will go on n on for an hour. I leave the phone on the table for 5 minutes with a few hummm…. she still continues talking but I don’t know what she said because she was talking to my table!

Jacky Chin: Morning Clement, I live with my sister and my cat, the only two in my house, my sister will tell me all about her work life and we discuss about it, and my cat will meow me all day long and I will listen and fulfill all her demands~ XD

 

20 June 2018

IT’S ALWAYS GOOD TO TELL YOUR STORY: I bet we all have a story to tell. But would we tell it? What would we want to share with the people who know us, and those who don’t? I occasionally have “sharing sessions” with my team members, like this one at Wisma HCK, and with other selected audiences. I used to think that we should keep our lives private, and nobody really cared what we had to say anyway. I’ve now realised the world has much to gain from our stories, no matter who or what we are. Where have we been, and what have we gone through? If our experiences have been sad or hurtful, many people would want to empathise and learn from the battles we’ve fought. A forum like this FB Page has afforded you and I the privilege to share our stories – and the lessons that accompany them. We shouldn’t leave our stories untold and our songs unsung. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my sharing here and elsewhere, it’s that we’re never alone.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Alice YokYuen Wong: My favourite topic, Sharing!
I had been sharing all of my life journeys on this platform so much so that I fear the regulars would be bored.
I shared about my early days of “fighting” to have an education because daughters were deemed to benefit “others” by virtue of being “given away” or “sold off” when we grow up. I am a Hakka and each time my sisters got married my dad would say “mai moi chu” – literally translated to mean sell off the daughter.😂😂😂
I shared about my struggles working in a 90% Malay environment of being laughed at for my then poor command of BM.
I shared about my fear of not being able to get another job after my VSS in my mid 40s!
Hahaha…. I had shared about almost everything in my life!
Good morning everyone, for me Sharing is Caring! I hope by my sharing, others will know they are not alone in a similar situation. Sigh….. my life journey had been riddled with potholes and trenches that I had fallen into but picked myself up. Life goes on friends! I have also learned a lot about others’ struggles and from them, realised that I am actually very blessed. God bless all of you my friends! I love all your sharings. Keep on with it.

Agatha Tan: Sharing is caring as an invited Speaker with another speaker Dr Ang Chai Tin, An educator with IPGP specialise in special needs children . Hope that my sharing will benefit some parents! 分享我自已带大特殊儿的心历路程,但愿能帮到一些父母。

# Child with Disabilities, why me?
#Pekaka

Law Jeffrey: It’s not always our own story but of those who are dead and have no one to tell to. On father’s day I told my children about my father their grandfather who they never met.
Of how as a 14 year boy left his family in china to come to Sarawak for work and never saw his family again until his death at the age of 71. I believe my children were touched and did learn something about struggles.

 

22 June 2018

HE’S SMILING, BUT I WAS UNDER THE WEATHER: I had flu, fever and a tight schedule those few days, but Cheong Yin Pin was adamant about meeting up during his last trip to KL. I’d known the Penang-based HR practitioner through FB, and he said he “treasured” his two earlier conversations with “a remarkable tycoon.” Cheong was persistent – he deluged me with emails and my secretary with calls, asking for another appointment. Yes, we did meet up, despite my blocked nose, bad cough and all. Persistence is the ability to keep pushing until you overcome the resistance or obstacles and get something done. I think persistence is even more important than perfection. The world is full of unsuccessful people with top-notch education and plenty of talent. But nothing can keep energetic and persistent individuals like Cheong from chasing and achieving their goals and dreams.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Cheong Yik Pin: Kam Siah Kam Siah so much Sir, highly appreciated! I am very sure being Persistent is your key ingredients too Sir! HAPPY Thursday Morning!

Wong Choon Lan: Many people had proved that “Persistence lead to the road of success. ” These people are from all corners of the world, some are great men n some are just mortal, but they have achieved the same goal, their dreams!
Don’t give up easily in whatever we do. If we insist to go on, we still stand a chance to win one day but if we give up totally, we have nothing left, not even a slim chance. Cheers to all my dear friends n our great man Tan Sri Clement, hope all of you are in the pink of health always!👍💪

Melvin Foong: I met another Tan Sri in a Chinese coffee shop two years ago. He was sharing table with me while Im having my BKT. I never realised who he is until we finished chatting about my BKT and asking me why I worked for another Tan Sri at that time…

I always love to listen to success stories and I always request 1 word from aspiring and successful person that I meet. That Tan Sri gave me the same word shared today by Tan Sri Clement Hii today:

PERSISTENCE

This word is powerful and motivates me whenever I feel of giving up. Thanks for highlighting it today, Tan Sri.

 

23 June 2018

THE PLEASURE IN SIMPLICITY: I just declined an invitation to go with friends on a 2-week European tour on a private jet. They couldn’t understand how I could have fun in life when I don’t travel much to faraway lands, don’t smoke, drink, play golf or indulge in expensive hobbies. Well, when I think of life’s pleasures, it’s mostly the little things that I find joy in savouring. They usually don’t cost anything and they can be the unassuming moments we go through each day. I enjoy the peace and quiet before a crazy day begins, and I eagerly read the online news and the Facebook comments here after work. In between, I love the meals at the coffeeshops, the chats with good buddies, and taking deep breaths after a heavy rain. Those are routine but meaningful moments, but most people don’t see or understand what they can offer, and are more inclined towards instant gratification. I think appreciating simple pleasures is an attitude, and has less to do with material attachments.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Philip Lim: One of my simplest but most meaningful pleasures in life is this…waking up on a Sunday morning and check with my mom on what she would like to have for breakfast, she would then give me her sweetest smile and off we go for a good family breakfast.

Seet Mei Ling: See Tan Sri, I told you that you are truly enlightened, being able to achieve happiness with such simple pleasures. I like your philosophy of Life 😀

Latha Ravindran: I do like expensive stuff. However I dont agree we cant find pleasure in simple things. I love the rain, love nature , my drive to work and the list is long. These are simple pleasures but come to think of it I treadure these the most. There is a sense of balance and rhythm it brings to life. Here’s to a cup of coffee and yoga on a cool saturday morning.

 

24 June 2018

TRUE COMMITMENT, LESSER EXPECTATIONS: It has been more than 3 months since I gave away the bride, so I asked my daughter Audrey how married life had been since she tied the knot with fellow dental surgeon Ken Pih in Brisbane early March. She curtly replied: “Good! Not much difference from those pak-toh (dating) days.” I know Audrey as someone who was used to getting her way, as the youngest of 3 siblings. But she has obviously accepted that the commitment of a marriage means one spouse can’t be right all the time. Our family shall host a belated wedding dinner next weekend, this time for relatives and friends in our hometown of Sibu. Young people assume that a beautiful wedding, with a dozen bridesmaids and groomsmen and a huge cake, will secure a happily ever after ending. But life, marriage included, is far from “perfect.” We’ll be amazed at the ways in which we sacrifice our early expectations in order to keep a valued relationship or partnership intact.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Tan Ching Hua: For a lasting marriage, there must be give and take. My daughter, also the youngest of three siblings is very outspoken and used to getting her own way. She just got married last year, after a four-year relationship. Some time back she shared an fb post,
Two rules for a happy marriage.
Rule no.1. The wife is always right.
Rule no.2. If you feel that she is wrong, slap yourself and read Rule no.1 again.
I have yet to ask her whether her husband abide by this rule.

Rohaty Majzub: Tan Sri “and they live happily ever after” only speaks for Holloywood cartoon fairy tales
Marraige has its ups downs phases across the lifespan: there are posionous venoms along the way that will pull the marraige down : how many couples will end up divorced or ended in affairs and cheatings
Thus we need a lot of give and take.patience empathy and shared visions. and values! Every 5 year phase is a challenge and some called it the 5 year ITCH ! You sink or float abscond or remain.true to marraige commitment
Those who have been married for 30 to 40 years understand the risks gambles and bliss of married.life
I wish your daughter and hubby the best :life has just began.!

Tay Cheow Hwang:
TRUE COMMITMENT, LESSER EXPECTATIONS

We can’t expect more,
Marriage is an union,
No perfection to call,
Upon imperfection to perform;

We can’t meet all,
Marriage is in unison,
No standard to call,
Upon substandard to conform;

We can only commit,
Marriage is about commitment,
Whatever the moment,
It’s about commitment to deliver;

We can only remit,
Marriage is about remittance,
Whatever the commitment,
It’s the truest in giving and taking.

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