Posted & filed under Others.

Many of us are inclined to judge others, which is a very unhealthy habit. If only we can be less judgmental of others, and be more introspective. Taken from my Facebook on 29 Apr 2017:

A JUDGE OF PEOPLE: Intentionally or not, we continue to judge other people all the time. We draw conclusions based on their outward appearances or the things they say or do without really knowing them. I think comparing others with ourselves & running them down gives us a false sense of security & superiority. If we feel good about ourselves, we’ll have no interest in judging other people’s choices, looks or behaviour. Maybe we’ll be less judgmental if we’re less conscious of our own perceived deficiencies.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Teh Lawrence: For most of us we have a common value system. E.g., we acknowledge that stealing is wrong and thus shouldn’t do it. Within that parameters we can engaged to say it’s wrong.
For some people though everything appears to be wrong except those done and chosen by themselves . There may be motives in such behaviour or such traits are ingrained in such personality.
A dust in people’s eye we see , a log in our own eye we cannot see.

Susan Quat: Before judging others we should look at ourselves too, no human is perfect . What others are going through n their challenges ahead might not be visible to us. So keep a positive outlook and don’t think more highly of ourselves.

Michael Stanley: Nowadays people are not judging us by behaviour but instead on attire. Recently a girl was not allowed to participate in chess competition due to her attire. A country and leader who has no ability to differentiate between business, politics and religion will be heading to a disaster.

 

My other FB postings between 24 Apr 2017 and 30 Apr 2017

24 Apr 2017

GET REAL! I’ve seen enough people with “necktie, collar but pocket no dollar,” trying to ooze confidence. It’s easy to see through them, cos when your net worth is zero, it visibly affects how you think, talk & act. We need to invest in tangible assets early to give our mind a truthful picture that we’re managing our money wisely, with sufficient funds at our disposal. Then our self-esteem would be for real. Pretending to be wealthy won’t cut it.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Susan Quat: Many times those that are rich they don’t have to show it, they stay humble as compared to those still struggling to be rich. Pretending can only works for a short period and sooner or later the truth will be out. Your sharing Tan Sri reminds me of the song ” The great pretender” by The Platters too.
Krizian Lim: “When your networth is zero, it visibly affects how you think, talk and act.” Agree.

If I were to draw a balance sheet of myself, I hope to see this in my assets column:

Tangible assets :
i. My material possessions

Intangible assets:
i. My knowledge
ii. My family, my friends
iii. My health and my smiles

This way, my networth will be higher. And yes, “it visibly affects how I think, talk and act.”

Philip Lim: If only everyone understands that it is no sin to be poor as long as you don’t pretend to be rich. Do not be a fake and try to jump for the sky when your feet can’t even be firmly on the ground.

 

25 Apr 2017

THINK THINGS THROUGH: Trying to keep things short is harder than I thought. There’re long-winded people who won’t stop talking unless you firmly cut them off. Meetings & reports remain longer than I’ve wanted. Same thing with trying to do shorter FB postings. Trimming down the 1st draft without losing the punch takes efforts. I shall persist. Getting to the point is important in life. We’ll have to always think things through, keep them short & stay focussed.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Chai Moi Moi: Good morning, Tan Sri. I agreed with you. I like your last sentence very much because it is the heart of your article today. Go straight to the point and don’t go round the bush because time is precious. Cheers and have a nice day.

Andrew Chan: In school we were taught the language skills of summarising n that also applies in life situations. It’s always easy to read a summary than a long narrative/essay. Great leaders r men of few words but whenever they talk, cometh words of wisdom n precision. They held their audience in anticipation, awe n suspense where as a man/woman tainted in principles, lacking respect will talk but no one bothers to listen. Worse r those who try to impress n talk without substance, thus making those present endure the pain of boredom n embarassment. Be a man/woman of influence n substance n your words though few will be like gold !

Frankie David Chieng: Putting your thoughts and main points into writing and read out in meeting to keep efficiency in shorter time. When people talk randomly then beating bushes starts. Get explaining and elaborating done after core meeting if possible. Wish you always keep meeting short and everyone happy.

 

26 Apr 2017

DON’T JUST COMPLAIN: Most people prefer not to confront controversial issues for fear of upsetting others. That’ll allow the problems to fester and eventually become unmanageable. I have friends & employees who’ll always complain about situations but never have the courage to do anything about it. By avoiding possible conflicts, we feel good in the moment but ignore the future. Maybe it’s time to speak up, hear what everyone else has to say, and work toward a solution together.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Cherie Tan: Complaining is developed nation people favourite hobby now, as we are in a comfort zone. Not too good but definitely not too bad zone, ‘wish’for better but too comfortable and scare for change of status quo to make any real movement for the real change.

We complain about police taking bribery but never think twice of speeding, make illegal u turn, double parking, offering under table when it is convenient. We complain about rudeness and lateness, but did not bother to say thank you, did not greet people, did not start the banquet on time (as a courtesy to those who care to arrive on time).

“If you’re not helping make it right, then stop complaining it being wrong.” – Unknown

Tay Cheow Hwang:
DON’T JUST COMPLAIN

We don’t suffer in silence,
When we’re in emotional turbulence,
Nor we just complain,
Frank about people and things in plain;

If we don’t complain,
We”ll suffer more,
If we just know how to complain,
We”ll suffer even more;

Problems can’t be subsided,
Wound is festering,
Nobody will be on our side,
If we don’t keep on moving;

Solutions are to be found,
Ground is stabilising,
Somebody will be there,
Together we’re overcoming;

Don’t just complain,
Satisfying your emotional needs,
Positively charged,
Let’s work towards solutions!

 

27 Apr 2017

A POKER FACE: We may not like the person in front of us, but if we were to be rude to him, he’ll likely put aside niceties and be rude to us too. I’ve employees and friends who just can’t keep their emotion in check & maintain their decorum. I agree it takes some doing to treat those we don’t like with civility. But it’s better to be the composed one, and be seen as professional & positive. When we need to, let’s put on a diplomatic poker face.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Rahman Yii: Being professional is about having a higher standard on oneself. Having higher standard is a discipline that is hard to cultivate but a must if one were to go far in business and in life.

Susan Quat: Being calm n staying cool rather than reacting especially in hostile situations will reflect on our characters. Don’t pour oil into the burning fire! Always keep our emotions in check.

Latha Ravindran: I have witnessed many episodes in meetings where people get worked up and sparks fly due to differences in opinion. As far as I am concerned I will try to put forth my ideas and if it turns out to be a conversation between a chicken and duck then I will wait to bring it up later or in private. It is rather distasteful when people get too emotional and awkward for the rest.

 

28 Apr 2017

DON’T TALK TO YOURSELF: In politics, it’s common for leaders to be surrounded by “yes people”. It’s uncommon for aides, civil servants & cabinet ministers to openly disagree with their political bosses. In business, we also have entrepreneurs who surround themselves with underlings who’re good at stroking their egos. That could be a recipe for disaster, as over time, the honchos become detached from reality. Having “yes men” who agree with everything you say is like talking to yourself.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

KK Aw: Bosses like people who agree with them, but if they don’t have contrarian views, they will get out of touch as Tan Sri has mentioned. At the same time, bosses do not like people who always disagree with them. When I had a few years of experience and started working directly with the company bosses, I was aiming for a 70/30 or better ratio. 70% of the time I will say yes so that I appear as an agreeable person but 30% of the time I will question the boss. I have to be very careful not to overdo the questioning. Fortunately, one of my English bosses was very open minded. When he wants an honest opinion, he will look for me.

Soon Lay Hong: You’re right Tan Sri most people like to hear sweet things rather than critical comments! Like myself I could not bear that most people around me are hypocrites who tend to utter things or reasons to please the bosses or their higher superiors!

Muhammad Aqil Deraman: Many adults have forgotten the tale about “The King’s New Clothes”. Some of our leaders have become an international laughing stock. But their courtiers tell them all is fine and dandy. Ends up, the commoners don’t know where to put their faces.

 

30 Apr 2017

IT WON’T BE OVER: There’s too much violence around us, and we wonder when it will all end. The current US-North Korea standoff isn’t very reassuring, even though that erratic Trump guy and the young dictator with the weird hairdo are continents away. We won’t have faith that the world is becoming a better place when there’re killing fields in so many unfortunate countries. Of course, the story will never be over. Not for those who are injured or killed or their families. They are the ones who’ll be left to cope with the consequences of violence for the rest of their lives.

 

Selected followers’ comments:

Emil Lee: Good morning and a blessed sunday to you and your family Tan Sri Clement and all my friends herein. We have had the 1st and 2nd world wars and we still have not learn the lessons from the devastation and the unneccesary lost of lives and properties. People seem to have forgotten about the effects of the atomic bombs that were dropped in Nagasaki and Hiroshima. The repercussion were long lasting. Now we have two clowns hurling words and provoking each other. Lets us hope they tone down and go back to the negotiating table and settle their difference amicably. There is never a winner in a war except the loss of human lives. May God bless us and protect us from this calamity. Amen.

Rodjeanall Tinjan: “There’s too much violence around us, and we wonder when it will all end”
-Clement Hii
There will be end, but not the ways we all expected. God will intervene, at the final countdown of humans destruction, by humans itself. We can only control our own action but not the whole world, which is very clear full of violence, greed, hatreds, all been written in the great books. There is a good reason, the Creator let it happen for time being, but lets not lost the LOVE, which is in us all. Just do good, in our own ways to all. Cheers, another beautiful gorgeous Sunday

Jennifer Chan: At the rate our country is going, with religion being used for political reasons, we are dreadful that it might one day be a killing field too. We pray it won’t be the case. Let us all embrace care and love for all races and religions.

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